As I mentioned in my Obligatory Introductory Post, one of the consequences of my job circumstances was that I gained 15 lbs from my normal “default” weight. The worse things got at work, the quicker the pounds piled on, and in my depressed state, I couldn’t sustain my half-arsed attempts to get back into shape for more than a week or two at a time. Could I have quit going to the bars every night? Quit eating a second dinner of nachos/grilled cheese/other bar food at 3:00 a.m. on a regular basis? Go to bed at a reasonable hour and get up early to exercise? OF COURSE. But alas, I did not, and the simple “calories in” vs. “calories out” equation led to the foreseeable outcome. I wasn’t “overweight” or “fat” – but I was definitely unhealthy, and “chubby” status was imminent.
Cuddling with a ham. Obvious “I sometimes enjoy meat in bed” joke.
And, in the interest of full disclosure, frankly I was mesmerized by how huge my boobies were getting. I was unwilling to recognize that the rest of me was expanding proportionately as well.
So as part of my self-imposed program to bring my life back to the full-time awesome status it had maintained up until about a year ago, I am committed to losing that extra weight within the structure of a challenging but realistic timetable. Starvation, diet pills, and similar such weight loss measures undertaken out of a sense of desperation are prohibited.
An excuse to walk 3.1 miles with a pitcher of screwdrivers and a bottle of champagne. And then head directly to the bars for hurricane pitchers at 12:30 on the dot. FITNESS!
The exercise aspect is back with a vengeance. I actually love running outside; lace up, crank the hard rock on my mp3 player, feel the sunshine on my face, and I’ll lose myself in my thoughts indefinitely. (As an aside, I hereby dub Killswitch Engage’s “As Daylight Dies,”
The diet aspect has been harder, simply because I developed so many bad eating habits over the past year. At least I have finally realized that I undo all my hard work at cardio and toning when I eat so much crap, and I’m trying to moderate and modify those choices. And also not say “screw it” for the whole day or week if I overdo it once. Meh. What can I say? Work in progress.
But I did realize, on one of my long walks no less, that I need to incentivize myself to stick to it. Fifteen pounds is overwhelming, so I need to divide it up into smaller increments and reward myself for reaching each weight loss goal. Specifically, for each 5 lbs I lose, I get another tattoo!
It’s all work that I really want to get done anyway, and none of it is related to losing weight itself.
If I were going to do a weight loss commemorative tattoo, however, this would be fine inspiration. What an awesome girl!
I’m going to force myself to abide by this rule: no new ink until I have achieved my goal, even though I’m really pumped about (hopefully getting more work done as soon as I get back to Atlanta. Telling myself that I needed to do this for health (or even vanity) reasons just wasn’t enough; apparently, I need the concrete goals and a more tangible reward to make these changes. I’m probably going to wait until I get back to Atlanta to step on the scale. I hate weighing myself and making it about numbers, but clearly I delude myself (e.g., “oh, it’s muscle weight” … From what? Lifting beer cans? Get real, Self.) otherwise, so this is the best quantitative measurement I have.
If all goes to plan, I should be posting a picture of my next tattoo within the next two weeks or so. Fingers crossed!
